Volume 3 Chapter 24 – Just Joking (4)

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Whew. Killing beasts is hard work, especially when there’s so many of them. I always get these dreams after absorbing a lot of cores, but I don’t really mind. They’re great for stress relief. I didn’t hit anybody after Softie died because the revenge should be hers, but I still wanted to smack something really hard, and these things showed up at the perfect time! It’s weird though. I didn’t absorb any cores; I only drank some blood, but these beasts appeared anyway. Hmm…. Well, it doesn’t matter! As long as they keep on coming, I’ll keep on smacking them!

Smack, smack, smack. Punch, punch, punch. Kick, kick, kick. Stomp, stomp, stomp. Smash, smash, …smash? Mm? Are there no more? I was starting to have fun too! Darn. Ah! Wait a minute! If I’m dreaming, doesn’t that mean I fell asleep? I didn’t mean to do that! I was supposed to get that core of the world tree for Ilya to save Softie! The longer Softie’s dead, the…. Hmm. Then the longer she’s dead! And that’s no good. Being alive is much better than being dead. I have to quickly wake up from this dream. But how do I do that? Mm…, the last time something like this happened, the dream ended when the last beast died…. Found it! This flying snake with claws was hiding underneath a dead turtle. Flaming Punch!

Ooh. I’m back! Where’s that old man? And where’s Ilya? How long was I asleep for? I’m not sure, but Mrs. Feathers is still here. She looks … fat. Did she eat too much? “Hey, Mrs. Feathers?” …Mm, she seems to be asleep. I guess I’ll store her in my life pouch for now. Let’s see…. There’s no one here. And if I try to get out of here by myself, I’ll get lost! Then there’s only one thing to do. I’ll try to find my way out and take all the treasures along the way. If I pass by an empty area, then I’ll know I went the wrong way. I’m a genius.

“Lucia!”

Mm? That sounded like Softie. And it is Softie! “Softie! You’re alive!” Ah, she’s the same old Softie that I know: nice and soft and squishy. “Welcome back. I caught those people who killed you and had them stored in boxes! Did you see?”

“Y-yes,” Softie said. Her face was a bit pale, but that’s understandable. She just came back to life! Any dead person would be a bit pale after waking up. I’m sure she’ll redden right up again soon. Mhm. “Lucia. You’re squishing me.”

Ah? But I barely hugged her…. I know I got stronger after that super-long day of meditation that totally wasn’t ten years, but I got used to my strength! I fought that old man who was as strong as me, and I perfected my control over my power. Then…, I got stronger? Again? Thanks to drinking all that beast blood? Gah! How annoying. “Where’s that old man? I want to fight him again.” Right. If I got stronger, then I want to see how much stronger I got!

“He’s over there.”

Ooh! Ilya’s here too! Well, Ilya was the one that saved Softie, so obviously she’d be here. And according to her, the old man is right … there! “Hey! Old man! Fight me!”

“Right here? In the treasu—”

“Flaming Hammer!” Hmm? He … went flying. I know I attacked him pretty suddenly, but he still pulled his sword out and blocked…. Maybe he wasn’t ready, but if he wasn’t ready, then he’s definitely ready now!

“W-wait!”

“Flaming Hammer!” That’s odd…. He was smashed into the wall and left a deep hole behind. Earlier, he could block my hit without moving an inch! Now he’s just like everyone else. I remember someone mentioning he was the strongest person before immortality…. Then, does that mean I’m the strongest person on the Immortal Continent now? I think I am! Unless an immortal shows up, but everyone knows immortals don’t come down here because it’s too hard for them to go back up. Ah? When did I learn that? In my dream! For some reason, I heard it in the old man’s voice.

“Did you get even stronger?”

“Durandal!” Gah! He disappeared before I could even finish saying his name! “Just let me Soul Scour you once, damnit!” Wait a minute. “Hey, Ilya, you made the virility pills, right? Does that mean you fixed Durandal too?”

Ilya shook her head. “Pill. There was only one pill.”

And that pill was spent on reviving Softie. “Then Durandal’s still broken.” Hah…. One day, I’ll fix him. “There’s no more ingredients for another?”

Before Ilya could say anything, Softie stepped forward. “There’s a world tree back in—”

“Ahem!” Ilya cleared her throat. “There’s no more ingredients for a virility pill here, but if we raid some more sects in the central region of the continent, I’m sure we’ll find a world tree’s core in one of their treasuries.”

Softie stared at Ilya with an intense expression. Why couldn’t she look at the barkeep like that? Then those two could be together, and I’d be known as a great matchmaker. Could it be that Softie … likes women? Hmm…. Nah, that’s impossible. Anyways, Ilya brought up a great idea. “Raiding sects! I approve! Where do we start?” Raiding sects is always fun. There’s so many treasures and so much stuff to be had. It’s like opening a wrapped present. I never got a wrapped present when I was little, but I heard about them! There’s unknown goodies inside a box, exactly like the treasures of a random sect. Mhm. Since I became the strongest person on the Immortal Continent, I have to exercise my newfound strength! But first, I have to take everything in this treasury first! I’ll start with this golden pillar since it’s the closest thing.

Mm? Something’s off…. There’s a passage underneath this pillar! “What’s down here?” I really want to know. It’s making my tail tingle. My nose is a bit itchy too. What kind of feeling is this? Am I hungry? Hmm, a little bit, but that’s not what’s making feel this way…. Wait! I know! It’s the feeling I was searching for back in the pocket realm! There’s definitely a feather down here that’ll make me sneeze and become an immortal!


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