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E sighed. “Forget it. I’ll take you to the fire elementals.”
Vur nodded and followed after E while preventing Stella from tugging on his hair. “Why do you want a sun anyways?” he asked, glancing up at the fairy queen.
Stella pouted and crossed her arms, keeping silent. She squealed when Vur tickled her side with his finger, and she smacked away his digit. “Stop that!” she said and pouted even harder. “Plants need sunlight to grow. Duh.”
“But you’re a fairy,” Vur said, ignoring the dwarves who were staring at him. The palace maids and butlers were gawking as E walked past them.
“I know I’m a fairy,” Stella said with a nod. She frowned at the workers and shook her fist at them. “What are you staring at? Never seen a fairy before?”
The dwarves glanced at Stella, and one maid spoke up. “No, no,” she said and fanned her face with her hands. “We’ve seen lots of fairies before. It’s just that … the king. He’s not sleeping inside the throne room. Is the world coming to an end?”
“Hey,” E said and snorted. “You don’t have to compare my leaving my bed to the end of times. Also, I’m not king anymore.” He pointed at Vur. “He is. Spread the word for me, thanks.”
Vur nodded at the stunned dwarves while continuing to follow behind E. “My name’s Vur Besteck. I’m your new king.”
“But, but you’re a human,” the maid said, her eyes as wide as saucers. “Your Gloriousness, this is not a tasteful joke.”
“It’s not a joke,” E said. “I’m 100% serious. He’s your new king. Just think of him as a really tall dwarf if you can’t fathom a human ruler.” He clicked his tongue. “If only Zappy was here, then I could make him announce a formal coronation ceremony.” He pointed at a grizzled dwarf butler standing by a suit of white armor. “You can do it. Announce a grand assembly; everyone important must attend. It’ll take place five weeks from now.”
“Yes, Your ex-Gloriousness,” the old dwarf said and saluted.
As E and Vur continued out of the palace, Stella tilted her head and peered at Vur’s arm. “Why are you moving around so much, Deedee?” she asked. “You’re tickling my roots.”
“I’m astounded,” Diamant said. “Absolutely astounded. Vur went from a criminal dwarf punter to the king of the dwarves without any issues: no blood was shed, no money was involved, the dwarf king peacefully handed over the throne. Is this what humanoids call dreaming? I think I’m beginning to understand why they shut their bodies down to sleep.”
“No,” Stella said and shook her head. The tattoo roots on Vur’s arm wriggled, forcing the brown runes down. “This isn’t dreaming. This is just a normal day in the life of Vur.”
“I don’t want to know what an abnormal day is like,” E said with a shudder. “And it’s a shame you only became king now. I just realized you missed the annual assembly. Well, the dwarf king hasn’t attended it in over a decade, but it would’ve been a good way to let the continent know of your new position.”
“Weren’t you the dwarf king for the last decade?” Diamant asked.
E nodded. “And I haven’t attended. Why would I go out of my way to do that when I have twelve trusted commanders beneath me?” He glanced at Vur who was admiring the paintings on the walls. Nearly all of them were blueprints, but there were the occasional pictures of a dwarf wearing a crown. “I should introduce you to my commanders. They’ll help you rule the kingdom more efficiently.”
“No need,” Vur said and shook his head. “I appoint you as my advisor. Feel free to run my kingdom however you see fit… until I reunite with my wife, that is. She might want to take over.” He snorted. “She usually doesn’t like my policies. What’s wrong with free money day? Everyone likes money.”
“Your wife has my condolences,” E said. The palace doors were opened by a set of floating armor, bathing the hallway with sunlight. The dwarf king squinted and pointed at a clearing in the garden which was lined with bricks. Dozens of carriages were parked side by side. “Do you want to guess which car is mine?”
Vur scratched his head as the group approached the parking lot. “That one,” he said and pointed at the plainest car in sight.
“It’s obviously that one,” Stella said and pointed at a black car with fireballs painted on its sides.
“Judging by your personality,” Diamant’s voice rumbled. “It’s the one that looks like a cloud.”
E clapped his hands once. “You’re all right!” he said and smiled. “All of these cars are mine.” If he was as tall as Vur, he would’ve patted his shoulder, but since he wasn’t, E patted Vur’s thigh instead. “Like I said back at your place, I’m gifting you a car. You can have any that catches your eye. Of course, this is temporary until a flying one is invented.”
Vur rubbed his chin. “Well, Tafel’s favorite color is purple,” he said. He pointed at the only purple car in the parking lot. “I’ll take that one.”
“Alright,” E said with a nod. He walked over to the palace wall beside the parking lot and retrieved a key that was hanging on a hook before tossing it to Vur. “I’ll teach you how to drive it on the way to the fire elementals’ headquarters. They live in a volcano about two weeks away if we drive at a moderate pace. I think their leader is a volcano spirit, but I can’t remember the guy’s name.”
“His name is Az,” Diamant said. “You’re talking about the clan master of the Flaming Fire Flickers, correct?”
“That alliteration sounds right,” E said with a nod.
“Good,” Diamant said. “It wouldn’t be fair if I was the only one who had to suffer under Vur’s hands.” The mountain elemental paused. “If Vur becomes the clan master of the Flaming Fire Flickers too, does that mean the Gemstone Merchants will merge with them?”
“You can rename yourselves to the Flaming Gemstone Fire Merchants Flickers Clan!” Stella said, throwing her hands into the air.
E glanced at Vur. “It seems like your commander also enjoys horrifically long names.”
Vur shrugged. When had Stella become his commander?